NEW OPT OUT INFORMATION – 2/21/18 – CONTACT CLINT ROYER at email@example.com
How soon we forget, and I got the evidence right here on the blog. Many of you, seriously, according to the searches I get, MANY of you remember my battle to get that pile of dead tree pulp, Market Value Place, out of my mailbox, and eventually, yours too. That battle started before I had a computer – I found a phone number, for buying ads in it, on the damned thing, and I called it. I got the circulation department at the Enterprise Record. I told the woman who answered the phone, “Hi, I want to get my name off the mailing list for Market Value Place…” Before I could finish my sentence she had laughed and hung up.
I called right back, and she hung up on me again. This time I was pretty sure she did it on purpose, so I called back again. No answer. That was my first experience trying to get this pile of (delete!) out of my mail.
I gave up at that point, I didn’t know where to turn. So, I just let it go, along with my internal organs, which take a beating when you try to ignore something that irritates the shit out of you.
Years later, I took it up with the Sustainability Task Force. I thought it would be a shoo-in – God was I shocked when Ann Schwab treated the issue like a bag of turds. I had actually fantasized us working like BFF’s on this issue. Chicks in Charge! But she just looked at me like, “what do you want from me, sincerity or something?“
STF member BT Chapman said, “we don’t want to risk offending the Enterprise Record.” Schwab also asked City Attorney Lori Bark-bark-barker if it was true that they legally needed to include the info on the mailer – Barker said NO! Actually, she said, she just couldn’t find it. Over $190,000/year salary alone, and Barker couldn’t find it? I was floored, but I don’t know why – hadn’t I already figured out that Schwab’s STF was nothing but a sham?
But I kept after them, and I started bitching at editor David Little. Little ignored me, which is weird, cause we’d have conversations about my letters, and this issue wouldn’t come up. He’s a stubborn mule, and I’m not saying that’s altogether bad, unless you disagree with him on something.
See, I’ll say this for Dave Little – I know his balls are in a noose. His newspaper promises “total market saturation” – meaning, everybody in town. They already have a list of subscribers to show their advertisers, but that’s not enough. They need to promise, they’ll send MVP to everybody who doesn’t subscribe to the paper. That really stinks, I know most of you agree, but Dave Little is not really in charge, he answers to some other guy, so I realize, this puts him in a spot. A spot I’d never find myself in, but nonetheless, a spot.
I finally got through to the STF, and Chapman, fearful of offending the ER? agreed to contact them. He came back with an address for a staffer – Jenny Jurdana, at firstname.lastname@example.org – and promises that Someday! the information would be printed in the MVP itself, as per the law. The law Barker couldn’t find.
These people just don’t care. They go home and dump their junk mail in the garbage can. Ann Schwab says she lines her garbage pail with it, so she won’t have to use plastic garbage bags! Well, I got news for her – that shit just goes completely airborne, a regular trash bomb, when the truck dumps that can. Thanks Ann!
I still get searches for that info almost every day. It’s been my hottest topic – EVER. I try to update that info regularly, but people still make it back in there to the old blogs, where I had said, “contact David Little”. Apparently, they’ve been doing just that. Today I got a note from David Little, and he was a little irked that I’d tell people that – he says he’s gotten a few, really pissed off people. I had to laugh – he’d forgotten what I went through trying to get that info? He’d forgotten that the info is supposed to be posted on the MVP?
I had to tell him – is he unaware how people HATE junk mail? I told him, it’s on par with telemarketers – haven’t you ever seen Jerry Seinfeld retire a telemarketer? Junk mail is also invasive, and for people who give a flying fuck at the moon – it’s bad for the environment, coming and going. I’d be willing to bet, our great, great, great grandchildren will curse us for the way we cut down trees to load them into landfills, most of it going straight from the mailbox to the garbage bin.
But the STF is so worried about plastic bags, they continue to pay Lori Bark-bark-barker to write an ordinance to ban shopping bags, but only at some stores, etc, etc. They could have banned this pulp mailer, but they wouldn’t even talk about that, they’re so worried about upsetting the more important apple carts in town, they don’t give a shit about those of us who pay the freight.
So, here’s the deal – I told David Little, he should put that info on the MVP, so people wouldn’t have to search for it – problem solved! But, I’ll also tell you here – please contact Jenny Jordana, at email@example.com. She will get you off that list, I’ve heard very good reviews of Jenny. I also just contacted her recently to make sure the address was still correct, and she got right back to me, all cheerful and stuff. PLEASE LEAVE DAVID LITTLE ALONE!
Try the honey route, save the vinegar for when they don’t cooperate, that’s what I always say.